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Use your powers as a Dominant for good!

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But when Lily dominates, she prefers to use more aesthetically pleasing ties and acts stern, but loving and gentle. Another Dominant may be simply "Jane," while another Dominant will not use their given name at all during a scene but instead a title. Why Pain Makes Us Horny: It doesn't need to be this way.

Lesson One: The Dominant Is Not (Really) In Charge

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Do you want your partner to be able to look you in the eye and tell you something is wrong or that something you did or said bothers them? But being a Dominant isn't just calling yourself Master or Mistress and flogging someone. While both partners are responsible for ensuring the scene proceeds faithfully and properly, the Dominant needs to be the one to remember to check in regularly during the scene, using the agreed upon safewords and other methods of communication that were set up before the rope was even taken out of its bag. Even if there are two Dominants using similar tools say, both use flogging who come from similar backgrounds, they are still two distinct people.

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